My opinion piece got published in the Des Moines Register today. I am beyond elated that it got such a huge piece of the Sunday paper. What an honor. You can read it on their website here or in the text below. "Imagine having a child with a diagnosis so rare that genetic researchers in three states ask your family to participate in medical research because they are officially learning from your child. Imagine having a child with neurological storms that no one caught until permanent brain damage had already been done. Imagine having a child so sick that the doctors you trusted come to your child’s hospital bed and tell you that they don’t know how to help you and have to send you elsewhere for help. Imagine being pulled into a private room and being encouraged to try cannabidiol. Imagine being so desperate to help your child and worrying if doing what is best for your child will make you a “criminal.” When you have a sick child, you find yourself in a battle to find the right team of specialists that can best manage their particularly rare set of circumstances. We never imagined we would have to fight for our child’s legal right to have his medicine. Especially when the recommendation came from his neurologist. Our situation in Iowa is hypocritical and cruel at best. My zip code should not dictate what medicines my child can access, nor should it dictate which representatives respond to our needs. My family should not have to concern themselves with breaking federal law to get a medicine that Iowa law says we deserve. Yet, many of our legislators continue to block access to cannabis oil. It is insulting to sit in a public hearing and listen to the testimony from Drug-Free Iowa, who worries more about the potential abuse of teenagers on a cannabis oil (which doesn’t even have enough THC in it to get a toddler "high"). Yet, my son is prescribed a benzodiazepine that is one of our country's most abused and deadly prescription drugs. I can go to my pharmacy to obtain benzodiazepine, an “FDA-approved drug,” which was prescribed to my child off-label. My son was given a drug that has never been approved for children. According to the FDA, benzodiazepine’s “adverse side effects on mental development may not become apparent until many years later.” Yet, I cannot legally obtain a natural organic substance patented and proven to work by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (Patent 6630507), which has no side effects and is nontoxic in high doses. The hypocrisy that lies in all of this is astounding. I’m a mom doing what my son’sspecialists told us was best for our child. Iowa's lawmakers have no place standing between patient-doctor relationships. I am not afraid of medical cannabis. I don’t have to worry about detrimental side effects, unless you count my son as being 243 days seizure free a “harmful side effect.” Cannabis has given my son a quality of life he has never known. He is learning how to ride a trike, do puzzles, he can walk and run and he is learning how to communicate. Cannabis has given my son the gift of finally being able to be a little boy at 3 ½, after a lifetime of suffering. It has given my son and my family our lives back. It is time for our legislators to stand up and do the right thing. Yet, the legislators who need to hear this are the ones refusing to come off of the House floor to speak with or respond to emails. It is incredibly frustrating that those who are supposed to speak for us don’t even listen or respond to those they are elected to represent. Iowans need to take note of who is telling their fellow sick and suffering neighbors “no” and vote accordingly this election season." Last Friday, my family along with another Iowa family had the great opportunity to meet with US Senator Charles Grassley. The Senator was gracious and allowed us twenty minutes to discuss with him the obstacles our children have faced in regards to their medical history, lack of seizure control before CBD and to discuss the Compassionate Access, Research Expansion, and Respect States Act of 2015, also known as the CARERS Act. Many people in Iowa don't quite understand the gravity of the matter when it comes to US Senator Grassley's involvement in medical cannabis. To our family, not only is Senator Grassley an Iowan, he also sits as Chairman of the Committee on the Judiciary and holds the key to families like mine gaining legality at the Federal Level. Without Senator Grassley allowing the CARERS Act to a vote in the Senate, families like ours will continue to fear being prosecuted at the Federal Level regardless of our state's laws. Senator Grassley was kind enough to get down to the details on the CARERS Act right away. He shared many of his concerns with this bill including the worry that by allowing each state the right to create their own marijuana laws, that the United States would inevitably end up with 50 different marijuana laws. The Senator feels that it is important for marijuana laws to have uniformity regardless of the fact that 23 states already have legalized some form of marijuana. Senator Grassley also shared his concern that smoking marijuana is not supported by medical research. However, the type of medicine we use for our children comes in an oil form and is taken sublingually. The Senator also discussed that he did not care for the banking section of the CARERS Act at all. When I asked if that part of the bill could be discussed and changed if it were allowed to go to vote in the Senate, he said that it could. So as a parent, I am having a hard time fathoming why the CARERS Act is not being allowed to be sent to the Senate for a vote when the items that the Committee on the Judiciary find concerning would actually be up for discussion at that point. As we chatted, our families talked to Senator Grassley about the side effects our children have faced due to pharmaceutical drugs. Abram's quality of life seriously diminished after he was prescribed Clonazepam, a benzodiazepine. I shared with the Senator that according to the FDA, there is no clinical trial experience with Clonazepam in patients under 18, that 30% of the trial patients had nervous system damage resulting in Ataxia, and that the adverse side effects on mental development could not become apparent until many years later. At that point, I presented the Senator with a little informational brochure. The imagery shows the regression of my son on too much benzodiazepine and the progression he made with the addition of the CBD. You can see in Abram's eyes that his life was improving. While looking at this image the Senator's eyes widened and he said: "You really CAN see a difference, can't you?" In addition to the FDA's trials on the particular drugs that reeked havoc on Abram's health, I also brought along the patent held by the United States Department of Health and Human Services that proves that Cannabinoids are safe and non-toxic up to 700mg. Abram only needs a small .10mg dose twice daily to have 100% freedom from physical seizures. I asked Senator Grassley why marijuana was still on the list of Schedule I Drugs when their Patent 6630507 proves marijuana in fact does have medicinal value but I did not get an answer. Senator Grassley just reiterated that there is a lot of movement towards medical marijuana and that research on CBD is not on federal barriers. He reminded us that he and Senator Feinstein wrote letters to the Department of Justice and the Department of Health and Human Services asking them to classify CBD separately from the whole marijuana plant. He also reminded us that the federal government also removed the Public Health Review process that marijuana researchers had to undergo, a move that has allowed marijuana to be studied under the same amount of restrictions as other Schedule I drugs. To give credit where credit is due, Senator Grassley has taken a few steps in the right direction but we need more action from him and our federal government and passing the CARERS Act to the Senate for a vote would be a great step. I tried to explain that CBD has been great for us and although Abram is seizure-free right now, the reality is that with our son's rare UBE2A gene mutation, the need for stronger medicine will most likely be a reality. (People often mistake Abram not having seizures right now as Abram being "cured" and that he'll never have a seizure again. This thought is foolish and I must clarify that regardless of AEDs and CBD, our son's brain is permanently injured, he has a neuronal migration disorder, already has atrophy in his hippocampus and his brain still fires irregularly all the time during the day and during the night. CBD has managed to keep those electrical shocks from manifesting into physical seizures but make no mistake - free of physical seizures does not mean free of abnormal brain activity.) I tried to explain to the Senator that Abram is doing well right now but as he grows the need for a stronger CBD/THC ratio may become a reality sooner than later and that if/when that need arises I will have to break both state and federal laws to do just that if laws stay the way that they are. I intend to fight for Abram's right to that medicine now in hopes that when he needs it; I won't have to continue to worry about being a Felon by doing so. While CBD doesn't help everyone, it does have the power to save lives. CBD has changed my son's life and it has changed the lives of many children that I know and love. I tried showing Senator Grassley as an example that if CBD helped just 10% of the 50,000 Americans that die each year due to seizures, that he himself would be responsible for saving at least 5,000 epileptic lives each year. Senator Grassley seemed a little exasperated at that number and asked why they would continue to push for these laws when "only" 5,000 lives would be saved. That statement took me off guard for several reasons because sitting right before him were two families and two boys whose lives had been changed immensely by CBD. Our sons' lives would be counted amongst those 5,000 lives. Yet, I couldn't help but to wonder what number of lives the Senator would deem worth saving. I would hope that ONE LIFE would be worth fighting for. While I bit my tongue, the other family spoke up and reminded him that that number was only meant as a representation of the epileptic lives he could save each year and that it didn't even include the impact he could have on the other people who suffer from different debilitating diseases and disorders. Luckily, his exasperation at theoretically "only" saving 5,000 epileptic lives annually made a good point as to why we need broader medical cannabis laws. CBD has changed my life, my son's life and the lives of the family who sat along side us in the meeting with Senator Grassley. Our children are proof of the success that children with seizure disorders can have on CBD. Even the Senator himself could see how CBD has changed the life of my son just by looking at the photos I had given him. Our children are a testament to how well CBD can work. However, CBD doesn't work for everyone and I refuse to fight for just part of a plant when my friend's children are still suffering. I also refuse to stop at CBD only because I myself may find that Abram needs something more as he grows and as his brain develops. Abram's gene mutation is rare and the only other family worldwide known to have this specific gene mutation lost a child at 11 to a seizure. I want to ensure that my son has legal access to whatever he may need - whenever he may need it. Alas, our time quickly ran out and after taking our photos with the Senator we went our separate ways. Many thanks to Senator Grassley for taking the time to meet with our families to discuss how CBD has changed our lives and to try to understand how important broader medical cannabis bills are to families in situations similar to ours. Cannabis is medicine. The government has already proven it. There are families being torn apart and lives being uprooted so people in situations similar to mine can give their child a chance at life. Please, take the time to write to your Senators, your Representatives and your Congressmen. Change needs to happen now and we need your help to stand up for what is right and speak for the little ones who don't have a voice. We are not criminals. We are parents just trying to do what is best for our loved ones, same as you. Much love, Abram's Mama Below is more of the "brochure" I made about Abram. Enjoy. Hey there Everyone!
I'm feeling scared lately. I had been asked to do a story on the News - just sharing Abram's story from the start and how hard it has been to first and foremost - get proper medical care for a child that is so very medically complex and lastly, having legal access to a medicine that he needs so badly. I chickened out on doing the story after getting advice from other parents/advocates in other legal states. I have written every Iowa Senator twice and have only gotten a few responses. I have written every single Iowa House Member twice as well and have started down the long line of calling home phone numbers (don't worry - they are posted publicly on their own website and completely legal). Most don't return my phone calls either. I have spoken with US Senator Grassley himself, I have spoken with US Senator Joni Ernst's Regional Director (still waiting for an official response from her) and I have met with the Iowa Governor's Health Advisor since the Governor is entirely too busy to meet with a worried mama regarding a bill he signed himself. I was told by the Governor's Health Advisor to reach out to the Iowa Department of Health who were by the way, absolutely sympathetic with our story - as is most people who hear it - but the law is the law and there is no way to get a Registration Card through the back door as I was led to believe. Yesterday was a hard day after several phone calls and exciting prospects only be be shoved back in the mud. I'm trying but I'm getting the steam knocked out of me. Only 72 people have been issued cards in our state. That is not many people getting help compared to the large amount of money our state spent on implementing said cards. And when you realize that of those 72 cards - most of them are probably care givers over actual patients. The fact is - when you sign up for a card - you also have to sign up anyone and everyone who would need to be able to administer the medicine. So for our family - we would need 3 cards just for us. However, that isn't even counting any of his care providers like Respite or SCL who can administer psychotropic drugs like Valium to my child in an emergency without needing such things in place. My son CAN NOT overdose on a medicine like CBD but we have tubes of Emergency Meds that are considered controlled substances that could kill him if he were overdosed on them and no one blinks an eye. How is it that people are MISSING THIS?! Being vocal about this is scary. Being open about it is scary. I backed out of the News Story out of FEAR. Fear that someone will take my child away. Fear of being thrown in jail for doing what is right. Fear of having his medicine taken away even though one of the Country's Best Hospitals who have a Level 4 Epilepsy standing back and support it 100% and I have proof of that within his own medical records. I'm sad and I'm frustrated and I want to do the right thing. Standing up for what you believe in has been such a vital role in my life - my whole life. Doing that is right is scary. My son is seizure free and that is what matters the most. But the story that goes with it..... matters. He is not just a "sympathetic story" as Gov. Chris Christie claimed when CBD was brought up in the Republican debate weeks ago. My son is a boy. A human. A child. My baby. My LIFE. My absolutely everything. And to think that me standing up and saying "Hey... our own Hospital and Physician betrayed us, the law isn't working for us and no one is helping." can land me in jail just because I said it publicly is horrifying. I've tried my hardest to do the right thing and play by the rules. I have written so many emails when I could be relaxing or reading a book. In my downtime, I am pleading for help from anyone who will listen. I don't get to relax or have "me" time because I am always having to fight for my son's rights. When you have to fight so hard just to get good health care - only to turn around and have to fight for his medicine - it is hard not to get angry. Change needs to happen and it needs to happen now. For him. For you. For your kids. For all of us. All parents have their breaking point and last Wednesday, I had mine.
We'd been gone for 8 days for our trip to the Mayo Clinic for their Diagnostic Team and my son had had enough. I had had enough. We just got home from a nearly 4 hour car ride where my son whined nearly the entire way and it'd been more than 48 hours since either one of us got some sleep. My father had finally urged me to put him down for a nap and for me to do the same. So, I put Abram down in his crib, made sure we did our normal routine of sound-maker, lavendar lotion back-rub and crib soother. Plus - the almighty blanket fluffing. But he just started to cry. I figured he was just over-tired so I went into my closet - to CRY. I just couldn't handle it anymore. Then I heard him screaming. An awful scream. And I ran in there to find my son had screamed so loud and so hard that he'd made himself projectile vomit all over himself, his bedding, through the crib slats and all over the floor. I yelled up the stairs to ask for my parents to help and my mom came running to clean him up while I changed all his sheets and scraped vomit off his pillows. We got him put back down and he fell right asleep while I fell into a heap on the couch and just BAWLED. I felt like a horrible mother. I felt like a failure. I felt lost. I felt alone. And I felt ANGRY. Since the day my son was born we have had to FIGHT. We had to tell the Nurses his lips and fingers were purple. We had to tell our Pediatrician - and another and another that SOMETHING WAS WRONG before anyone would listen. I KNEW he was having seizures before the "professionals" even agreed with me. When you have a sick kid you lose everything: Your friends who you thought would always be there. Your family who just don't understand so they don't bother to say anything. Your faith in people and doctors and even the universe. It is HARD and no one gets it except for the people who live it. At Mayo we were treated with Dignity and Respect. My old videos that I showed for seizure examples were confirmed as just that. When my son was collapsing and our local doctors turned us away and told us they couldn't help us and shipped us off.. it turned out that they were overdosing my child on a benzo. Those collapsing spells weren't new seizures - they were a side effect of TOO MUCH MEDICINE. At Mayo, we were NOT frowned upon or shunned for giving our child CBD. At Mayo, we weren't told that we needed to add yet another harmful pharmaceutical with a myriad of dangerous side effects to our toddlers medicine regiment. Does that mean it will always be so? I don't know. He has EPILEPSY. Our pediatrician said it best when she said "I can't tell you what the next year will bring you. But I can tell you it's not your fault". In Iowa:
Today, when speaking with US Senator Charles Grassley - I admitted that although I tried my best to follow the law here - and went through all of the proper routes - I was unable to obtain the Registration Card for my son. Due to that reason, I was forced to do what was best for my child and that I was happy to report that my son is nearly three months free of physical seizures. I did not get a congratulations. Or an "I'm happy to hear that". Instead I was quickly dismissed to another one of his advisors who talked to me about all the things that Grassley is doing to try and change things but that CBD cannot be rescheduled until there is more "research". I reminded him that such research would not be able to be done UNTIL they rescheduled CBD as a Schedule II drug - due to the fact that it is illegal at the Federal Level - no research can be done until that happens. I got a chuckle and a bad joke about "The Chicken and the Egg" metaphor. In light of the need for "more research" I asked specifically how it is that the United States Government and the Department of Health can have a Patent 6630507 for "Cannabinoids as an Antioxident and Neuroprotectant" and that their own document states clearly that cannabinoids "are substantially non-toxic even at very high doses" To which he laughed and said "We are Congress not Scientists". Imagine now - if this were your child. Suffering from Day One and as a parent - being forced to be a "criminal" because Doctors, Hospitals and Politicians don't have the guts to stand up for what is right. Hello, I have written to you (Bill Leaver and Kevin Vermeer) several times since June with no response. Julia is listed as a contact for media on the Unity Point website and I have not received a response from her either. I called and left a message for Mr. Vermeer's assistant last week and did not receive a response that way either. Incase you didn't receive them before, you can find them by scrolling past this email to the bottom as they are also included in this email. I have shared my story with the Des Moines Register, Associated Press, the President of the Iowa Senate as well as with all of the Republican House and Senate Members. Senator Grassley's office admitted that they were aware of your hospital policy not allowing your physicians to sign off on the CBD cards, which I found shocking. I also have contacts at most of the major news outlets for television as well. I am sure Iowans would be interested in hearing that the non-profit and publicly funded hospital who touts in their commercials about how much they care for sick kids are blocking an already extremely limited bill that parents fought so hard to get. Perhaps my last emails were too lengthy but it is difficult to share my son's story without it. I am not going to write why I think CBD is a good choice for my child. Your hospital has made it clear with its policy that you don't trust your own doctors let alone the parents of your own patients to decide what is best for their children. So I will just share with you some facts about my child's healthcare journey. My son just turned 3 this month. In those three years he has had to fight so hard to do things that other kids and families take for granted. Two years ago, I was informed that he has a mass growing in his brain and that the mass would most likely cause seizures and that it would require surgical intervention at some point in his life. The mass is circled in yellow below. Due to that mass, my son has to go through routine MRIs which are dangerous in so many ways to a young body. Yet, your hospital won't let us have legal access to a medicine which is anti-tumoural and anti-seizure. Instead - you would rather us put him through MRIs and multiple sedations to make sure it isn't growing. So every six to nine months we have to say goodbye to our son and pray that he wakes up from sedation and that he doesn't stop breathing during the procedure again. In addition to the mass in his brain he also suffers a Rare Chromosome Disorder called 7q31.31 which deleted the KCND2 gene, which also pre-disposes him to Epilepsy. He is just ONE of THIRTY-FIVE people in the world who are known to have this.
We learned all of this before he turned 18 months old. However, on top of that he was also diagnosed with Hypotonia (he was unable to walk until he was 30 months old), Sensory Processing Disorder, Microganthia and more. His diagnosis list doesn't stop there but due to the fact that you have zero care in the world for what my son is going through or what my family is going through. After all, your paid Lobbyist/Employee/Manager of Child Protection at your hospital stated publicly that “We don’t know if families use it for their children that maybe four years from now they could contract cancer or something like that.” We have seen three Neurologists and five Neurosurgeons. We have been to two Nephrologists (one who incorrectly diagnosed my son at YOUR hospital - forcing us to go to Iowa City), we have been to the CDD to meet OTs, PTs, STs, Developmental Specialists, we have put him through FOUR EEGs and FOUR MRIs and we have seen countless other specialists like Endocrinology, Orthopaedic Surgeons and Cranio-Facial Surgeons. We have been to the MN Epilepsy Group and are heading to Mayo for their diagnostic clinic in the upcoming months as well due to the fact that no one in Iowa can put the pieces together for us. I am writing you because I think that if you even took one look at these kids and the lives that they live you would understand that they need help NOW. My son needs reprieve. His Generalized Seizures and Abnormal Brain activity make is so that he never gets a break. Can you imagine getting shocked all day, every day and even while you are sleeping? Could you imagine how the lack of sleep would make a person feel? My son has never had a full good day. My son has never had a full night's sleep. My son has never had a summer or a spring or a winter without countless appointments and that doesn't even count his therapies. Can you imagine working for months and even years on learning words only to have them taken away by a seizure? Can you imagine how hard it is as a parent not to hear your child call you Mama? It is heart breaking to try to share his story with people who are so against a medicine that may have the chance of changing his entire quality of life. A medicine that has been proven in other countries and other states to be effective on Epilepsy. However, my son doesn't just have Epilepsy. He also has that mass in his brain that I shared with you. If that were your child - wouldn't you rather take the slight risk of giving him a medicine that could have the possibility of not only taking away his seizures but also shrinking that mass in his brain? A mass that all of our specialists are waiting to grow. A mass that has doubled in size since 2013. A mass that can cause life threatening and irreversible neurological damage. If that were your son's brain - wouldn't you want to take the risk of giving him a plant in lieu of waiting for the most invasive brain surgery there is for your toddler? If that were your son - wouldn't you appreciate the Executives at your own child's hospital taking the time to respond to your concerns? Please sirs. Change your policy on CBD. Please help my son. Sincerely, Erin Miller |
About MeHello! My name is Erin. I am Abram's mom, a tireless advocate for UBE2A Deficiency Syndrome and a fierce proponent for medical cannabis. MOST POPULAR BlOG ENTRYJOIN US
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